hmmmm... no Sleepy Jeff?
At this point Tom's yawning is making SJ so tired that he may have to pull over. He's driving a tourist bus on the way back from taking a group of 12- and 13-year-olds to Washington, D.C. to see all the sights. Tom questions his decision to talk on the phone while driving, but SJ thinks it's fine because he can drive the bus with his knees. Tom thinks this is a terrible steering strategy. SJ says he has the phone in his right hand while his left hand dangles his cig out the window. He is only able to keep one eye open due to his exhaustion. Tom thinks it's horribly unsafe, but SJ says it's fun for the kids, who are all asleep because he gave them something: Blue. Tom think it's criminal to provide drugs to young schoolchildren. SJ assures him that the kids are having fun. He disputes the drug charge because Blue is available over the counter ... at one store. Tom says it's still an illegal product, and SJ wants Tom to define "illegal". Tom explains that there are existing laws on the books and these actions defy those laws. SJ does't seem convinced, but he is about to do something that he knows is illegal. He is preparing to pass three slow-moving vehicles on the left, which will force him into oncoming traffic in the opposite lane for a second. Tom doesn't think he can manage this delicate maneuver in a school bus. SJ thinks he can and then screams "Oh my God!" before hanging up.
I was going to vote for Hammerhead but rumors have been flying that Pudge slipped him an Anthrax tape and that he's been listening to nothing but thrash metal in his car ever since. >:( >:( >:(
Quote from: recapSJ thinks he can and then screams "Oh my God!" before hanging up.
hmmmm... no Sleepy Jeff?I believe that SJ passed on due to injuries suffered from the bus accident at the end of his 4/1/08 call:
I was going to vote for Hammerhead but rumors have been flying that Pudge slipped him an Anthrax tape and that he's been listening to nothing but thrash metal in his car ever since. >:( >:( >:(
Let me know if you can confirm these rumors so I can switch my vote to Hammerhead!
Tom, I was able to vote for as many candidates as I liked. But after you vote, you can't vote again. You have one go.
Also, um, excuse me, but on the May 22, 2007 show, the guy who calls in about Power Pop Pop Pop clearly mentions that Officer Harrips' father was once mayor, but on yesterday's show there was a discussion of past Newbridge mayors but Mayor Harrips seems to have somehow been erased from the canon. I'd expect this kind of inconsistency from Marvel or DC, but I find this oversight totally unacceptable from the Best Show. I will require a full refund.
Tom, I was able to vote for as many candidates as I liked. But after you vote, you can't vote again. You have one go.
Also, um, excuse me, but on the May 22, 2007 show, the guy who calls in about Power Pop Pop Pop clearly mentions that Officer Harrips' father was once mayor, but on yesterday's show there was a discussion of past Newbridge mayors but Mayor Harrips seems to have somehow been erased from the canon. I'd expect this kind of inconsistency from Marvel or DC, but I find this oversight totally unacceptable from the Best Show. I will require a full refund.
I believe "Whitey" Harrups wasn't one of the more renowned mayors, which may explain his exclusion from the list.
Also, is it Harrups, Harrops, or Harrips? Fotpedia spells it both Harrups and Harrops.
I wasn't even considering AP Mike until he showed up for the show drunk. That gets my vote.
Tom, I was able to vote for as many candidates as I liked. But after you vote, you can't vote again. You have one go.
Also, um, excuse me, but on the May 22, 2007 show, the guy who calls in about Power Pop Pop Pop clearly mentions that Officer Harrips' father was once mayor, but on yesterday's show there was a discussion of past Newbridge mayors but Mayor Harrips seems to have somehow been erased from the canon. I'd expect this kind of inconsistency from Marvel or DC, but I find this oversight totally unacceptable from the Best Show. I will require a full refund.
I believe "Whitey" Harrups wasn't one of the more renowned mayors, which may explain his exclusion from the list.
Also, is it Harrups, Harrops, or Harrips? Fotpedia spells it both Harrups and Harrops.
I think that a Newbridge Infinite Crisis may be needed to fix this, personally.
Was only able to vote once.
I suppose an option could be one of those embedded polling sites, like from polldaddy or one of those, right smack on the front of the main friendsoftom.com page (or I suppose could be embedded into a post on the boards too actually). I'm pretty sure those can either be set to allow multiple/unlimited votes or at least the cookies for them expire pretty quickly. Either way.
I'm leaning towards Marky Ramone, if only because of his fascinating tour stories.
Oh, zip it, you big old baby!
T-T-T-Tor Halversom is going to have me killed now, because I promised to rig the election in his favor, and now I can't follow through. Frankly, I'm in over my head and horribly afraid. Does anyone have a couch I can crash on for a little while, till the elections pass? I'm hiding out at the Newbridge bus station for now, and using the free wifi from the hotel across the street to plea for sanctuary.
Huh, that's new... What is that delicious smell? Oh god. Wait!!! That's CHOCOLA-
*a wet thud is heard moments before my account is deleted forever*
I'm leaning towards Marky Ramone, if only because of his fascinating tour stories.
I don't think you should vote. My advice is do something besides voting, because your opinion doesn't jive with the facts in my brain.
You are paranoid and need professional help. In the mean time, you may share my couch with the best creature*.
(http://i40.photobucket.com/albums/e218/eymanjr/dogs/100_1279.jpg)
*Regular Joe may not really sleep on my couch and I hope he is frightened now.
hammerhead is getting robbed!
I was thinking that Mike wouldn't make a great mayor because he would always be drunk in office until I realized that that's probably better than what the other candidates would be doing.
These numbers are baffling to me. Why am I running neck and neck with that pint-sized pseudo-intellectual, Pudge Palfner? I can understand the popularity of Philly Boy Roy and Marky Ramone (although some of those tour stories sounded fishy to me--did you notice that all the eyewitnesses happen to be dead?), but Pudge's popularity escapes me. Are a lot of the voters mistaking him for the new Yankee catcher?
I've come to expect this kind of rhetoric from your mismanaged campaign.
It's about the issues, not style and flash, and Pudge delivers a platform Newbridge can believe in.
I've come to expect this kind of rhetoric from your mismanaged campaign.
It's about the issues, not style and flash, and Pudge delivers a platform Newbridge can believe in.
Hogwash!
Will someone remind me what Pudge's platform is? Besides "murdering Tom," which I'm against, is there anything I might be for? Is he the "no child unsliced" candidate? Who's doing the pizza vouchers?
Maybe next time I'll just vote for Marky Ramone. He has the best chant.
I've come to expect this kind of rhetoric from your mismanaged campaign.
It's about the issues, not style and flash, and Pudge delivers a platform Newbridge can believe in.
Hogwash!
That's right. Pudge Palfner, though terrified of public speaking, made the brightest and most on-topic speech of the convention. I was confusing him with the "No Child Unsliced" candidate, the barberpole guy.
Vote Pudge!
Marky Ramone was the candidate proposing the "Leave No Child Unsliced" program.
Then what does the barberpole candidate want?
I propose that Associate Producer Mike affiliates with a party (is this too late?/has this already been discussed?)
some suggestions:
The Call Screener's Party
The Show Behind the Show's Party
The Flamingo Diners Party
The Calzone Tattoo Party
The Zune Tattoo Party
I propose that Associate Producer Mike affiliates with a party (is this too late?/has this already been discussed?)
some suggestions:
The Call Screener's Party
The Show Behind the Show's Party
The Flamingo Diners Party
The Calzone Tattoo Party
I propose that Associate Producer Mike affiliates with a party (is this too late?/has this already been discussed?)
some suggestions:
The Call Screener's Party
The Show Behind the Show's Party
The Flamingo Diners Party
The Calzone Tattoo Party
The Zune Tattoo Party
Fixed!
Well, at least I wasn't wishy-washy about The Wire the way Hammerhead was wishy-washy when I suggested a one-on-one pit in the parking lot of the Debate Pavilion after he elbowed me in the groin during that second pit he tried to get started. "Maybe another time," he whimpered. I later saw him waiting at a bus stop until Pudge's dad pulled up and gave him a ride.
A vote for AP Mike is a vote for the death of Newbridge. Wake up!
A vote for AP Mike is a vote for the death of Newbridge. Wake up!
A vote for AP Mike is a vote for the life of Tom. What's more important?
A vote for AP Mike is a vote for the death of Newbridge. Wake up!
A vote for AP Mike is a vote for the life of Tom. What's more important?
Touche. Mike's refusal to murder Tom is worth considering, but banning Little Mikey Halversom from Little League will likely lead to the entire town being flooded with chocolate.
Touche. Mike's refusal to murder Tom is worth considering, but banning Little Mikey Halversom from Little League will likely lead to the entire town being flooded with chocolate.
Touche. Mike's refusal to murder Tom is worth considering, but banning Little Mikey Halversom from Little League will likely lead to the entire town being flooded with chocolate.
Touche. Mike's refusal to murder Tom is worth considering, but banning Little Mikey Halversom from Little League will likely lead to the entire town being flooded with chocolate.
AP Mike is the only candidate who has not been reduced to a stuttering, terror-filled wreck at the mere thought of Tor Halversom. He's been bold enough to add an anti-Halversom motion to his platform. AP Mike is the only candidate who will be unaffected by Mr. Halversom's mob boss tactics. AP Mike can lead Newbridge to a future unaffected by chocolatier terrorism.
And keeping his kid out of softball? I think AP Mike had the old story about Al Capone in mind--the one where Capone invites all his cohorts over for a nice dinner where he reveals that he knows someone's been leaking information, then after his speech centered around a pleasant baseball analogy about teamwork and fair play and a baseball bat as a visual prop he calmly murdered the suspected offender with the baseball bat right in front of everyone.
AP Mike keeping bats out of the hands of mobsters' children can be nothing but positive.
A vote for AP Mike is a vote for the death of Newbridge. Wake up!
AP Mike is the only candidate who has not been reduced to a stuttering, terror-filled wreck at the mere thought of Tor Halversom. He's been bold enough to add an anti-Halversom motion to his platform. AP Mike is the only candidate who will be unaffected by Mr. Halversom's mob boss tactics.
Touche. Mike's refusal to murder Tom is worth considering, but banning Little Mikey Halversom from Little League will likely lead to the entire town being flooded with chocolate.
AP Mike is the only candidate who has not been reduced to a stuttering, terror-filled wreck at the mere thought of Tor Halversom. He's been bold enough to add an anti-Halversom motion to his platform. AP Mike is the only candidate who will be unaffected by Mr. Halversom's mob boss tactics. AP Mike can lead Newbridge to a future unaffected by chocolatier terrorism.
A vote for AP Mike is a vote for the death of Newbridge. Wake up!
A vote for AP Mike is a vote for the life of Tom. Who's more impotent?
A vote for AP Mike is a vote for the death of Newbridge. Wake up!
A vote for AP Mike is a vote for the life of Tom. Who's more impotent?
I think we should leave the condidates sexuality out of this.
-Ajax
A vote for AP Mike is a vote for the death of Newbridge. Wake up!
A vote for AP Mike is a vote for the life of Tom. Who's more impotent?
I think we should leave the condidates sexuality out of this.
-Ajax
A vote for AP Mike is a vote for the death of Newbridge. Wake up!
A vote for AP Mike is a vote for the life of Tom. Who's more impotent?
I think we should leave the condidates sexuality out of this.
-Ajax
But if they are impotent, they won't be any scandles and it will be very boring.
Quote from: Omar on August 29, 2008, 06:20:59 AM
Touche. Mike's refusal to murder Tom is worth considering, but banning Little Mikey Halversom from Little League will likely lead to the entire town being flooded with chocolate.
AP Mike is the only candidate who has not been reduced to a stuttering, terror-filled wreck at the mere thought of Tor Halversom. He's been bold enough to add an anti-Halversom motion to his platform. AP Mike is the only candidate who will be unaffected by Mr. Halversom's mob boss tactics. AP Mike can lead Newbridge to a future unaffected by chocolatier terrorism.
And keeping his kid out of softball? I think AP Mike had the old story about Al Capone in mind--the one where Capone invites all his cohorts over for a nice dinner where he reveals that he knows someone's been leaking information, then after his speech centered around a pleasant baseball analogy about teamwork and fair play and a baseball bat as a visual prop he calmly murdered the suspected offender with the baseball bat right in front of everyone.
AP Mike keeping bats out of the hands of mobsters' children can be nothing but positive.
Exactly, and in addition to standing up to the chocolate czar by even running at all, he was the only condidate with the gumption to attack Halversom at the debates. AP MIKE IN 08!!
I was thinking that Mike wouldn't make a great mayor because he would always be drunk in office until I realized that that's probably better than what the other candidates would be doing.
Thank you, Allison (I think). Also, let's not forget that I'm the only candidate who promised NOT to kill Tom. No Tom, no Best Show. Think about it and then vote for me: Nonmurderous Mike.
Now, you not killing Tom is what initially got my vote, but will you prevent others from killing Tom? These are the issues that matter to me.
I do like the drunkenness as well. It's totally hardhat.
Now, you not killing Tom is what initially got my vote, but will you prevent others from killing Tom? These are the issues that matter to me.
I do like the drunkenness as well. It's totally hardhat.
Of course I'll prevent others from killing Tom! I've already demonstrated as much in previous brushes with Stevie Blue and that faux fisherman.
A vote for Pudge is a vote for rationality and progress... two things have that have no place in Newbridge.
Hammerhead/Fontana '08
Who are the other disgruntled Kurt Gaistburn supporters voting for?
Who are the other disgruntled Kurt Gaistburn supporters voting for?
While I'm not casting my vote for either, the Halversom and Meyers campaigns seem to be most Gaistburnian. Tor Halversom is a man of action who knows how to get results and consolidate a powerbase. Dr. Meyers shares Kurt's ability to assess the strengths and weaknesses of his opponents.
not to get all toilet mouth - but what the fuck? mike is winning? by this much?
c'mon...
not to get all toilet mouth - but what the fuck? mike is winning? by this much?
c'mon...
Every vote for PBR or that barbershop guy includes a vote for Mike. That's why he's winning.
not to get all toilet mouth - but what the fuck? mike is winning? by this much?
c'mon...
Thanks for the support Pat K, CurtBlair, and tomkaters (and Julie, I think). I'm feeling a real groundswell now (that's a good thing, right?).
I ran into Danny Aiello yesterday at Tutta Pasta and I got him to vote for me (one of his hangers-on had a laptop). Unfortunately, he turned down Tom's request to be on the show when I couldn't produce a business card.
Thanks for the support Pat K, CurtBlair, and tomkaters (and Julie, I think). I'm feeling a real groundswell now (that's a good thing, right?).
I ran into Danny Aiello yesterday at Tutta Pasta and I got him to vote for me (one of his hangers-on had a laptop). Unfortunately, he turned down Tom's request to be on the show when I couldn't produce a business card.
I'VE GOT A BIG PROBLEM WITH ALL OF MIKE'S POSTS ON THIS BOARD. WHERE'S THE EQUAL TIME FOR THE OTHER CANDIDATES? THAT'S MANDATED BY NEWBRIDGE LAW - I THINK.
I'VE GOT A BIG PROBLEM WITH ALL OF MIKE'S POSTS ON THIS BOARD. WHERE'S THE EQUAL TIME FOR THE OTHER CANDIDATES? THAT'S MANDATED BY NEWBRIDGE LAW - I THINK.
not to get all toilet mouth - but what the fuck? mike is winning? by this much?
c'mon...
I thought I told you to go home and get your shinebox, AIP. What are doing still hangin around here?
um... i think you said that to someone else, actually. so... you're not only willfully losing the battle against full blown alcoholism - you may be senile as well.
translation: you may just be the candidate of my dreams.
I'VE GOT A BIG PROBLEM WITH ALL OF MIKE'S POSTS ON THIS BOARD. WHERE'S THE EQUAL TIME FOR THE OTHER CANDIDATES? THAT'S MANDATED BY NEWBRIDGE LAW - I THINK.
Come on, Mike is actually showing restraint. Contrast it with the horrible, filthy rants McCain has been posting on the Something Awful forums.
Some days Mike is winning, other days belong to Philly Boy Roy or Pudge ...
I think this is all related to phases of the moon and stars. Which candidate has the best astrological advisor?
Thanks for the support Pat K, CurtBlair, and tomkaters (and Julie, I think). I'm feeling a real groundswell now (that's a good thing, right?).
I ran into Danny Aiello yesterday at Tutta Pasta and I got him to vote for me (one of his hangers-on had a laptop). Unfortunately, he turned down Tom's request to be on the show when I couldn't produce a business card.
I'VE GOT A BIG PROBLEM WITH ALL OF MIKE'S POSTS ON THIS BOARD. WHERE'S THE EQUAL TIME FOR THE OTHER CANDIDATES? THAT'S MANDATED BY NEWBRIDGE LAW - I THINK.
Let's also remember that A.P. Mike is the only candidate known to have watched the entire run of The Wire, ...
Let's also remember that A.P. Mike is the only candidate known to have watched the entire run of The Wire, ...
Pudge wrote several of the best episodes under the nom de plume "George Pelecanos."
PALFNER '08!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
There will be a place for you in my administration for your steadfast campaigning, CurtBlair. Manus manum lavat! (That's Latin, Hammerhead, you dunce!).
No go on the John from Cincinnati homage bumper stickers, CB. That show's dead to me.
Every vote for PBR or that barbershop guy includes a vote for Mike. That's why he's winning.
explain please.
Can I like both Hammerhead and bagels?
Can I like both Hammerhead and bagels?
Not unless you blend them with raw eggs and drink them.
If you were truly hardcore you wouldn't even take them out of the shells.Can I like both Hammerhead and bagels?
Not unless you blend them with raw eggs and drink them.
what does that have to do with hardcore?
If you were truly hardcore you wouldn't even take them out of the shells.Can I like both Hammerhead and bagels?
Not unless you blend them with raw eggs and drink them.
what does that have to do with hardcore?
If you were truly hardcore you wouldn't even take them out of the shells.Can I like both Hammerhead and bagels?
Not unless you blend them with raw eggs and drink them.
what does that have to do with hardcore?
If you were truly hardcore, you wouldn't even take them out of the chickens.
Wow! AP Mike is starting to run away with it.
Can he continue his AP duties as Mayor?
Come on hammerheadheads, let's get this pit started!! >:(
Wow! AP Mike is starting to run away with it.
Can he continue his AP duties as Mayor?
Are Chris and Gord that boring gay couple who call in each week from Toronto? I'm relatively new to the show, so I still haven't gotten a true sense of the "regulars" (except OT who's giggling and tedious movie reviews get on my nerves).
Quote from: B._Buster link=board=fotboard;num=1054419886;start=15#22 date=06/04/03 at 14:48:19Are Chris and Gord that boring gay couple who call in each week from Toronto? I'm relatively new to the show, so I still haven't gotten a true sense of the "regulars" (except OT who's giggling and tedious movie reviews get on my nerves).
Associate Producer Mike, you have my votes.
You know what I like about PBR? Nothing. I laugh at him. I go home at night and I laugh at him. He's garbage and he knows it.
You know what I like about PBR? Nothing. I laugh at him. I go home at night and I laugh at him. He's garbage and he knows it.
You know what I like about PBR? Nothing. I laugh at him. I go home at night and I laugh at him. He's garbage and he knows it.
You know what I like about PBR? Nothing. I laugh at him. I go home at night and I laugh at him. He's garbage and he knows it.
Mike must not be worried about potential gaffes if he's taking his political cues from the star of Grin and Barrett.
You know what I like about PBR? Nothing. I laugh at him. I go home at night and I laugh at him. He's garbage and he knows it.
Mike must not be worried about potential gaffes if he's taking his political cues from the star of Grin and Barrett.
You're just trying to goad Mike into dismissively comparing Mad Men to the second season of Bosom Buddies where they open their own ad agency, aren't you?
Yes, I forgot my mantra. And yes, you are a dumbass.
I've switched my allegiance from Pudge Palfner to Philly Boy, only because we can not let Mike win.
What's the problem, el? You got a soft spot for potentially lethal overweight Little Leaguers? You got something against tying one on once in a while (or on a regular basis)? You got some sort of beef against body art?
BRIMSTEADDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD
BRIMSTEADDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD
I am holding out for a AP Mike/ Brimstead coalition government.
Attention Pudge Palfner voters! Did you know that off the air he once admitted to me that he believed that the Sun revolved around the Earth?
He can think whatever he wants about the heavens, the stars in the firmament, and stuff. Pudge still has the best down to earth plan for Newbridge. Let's get him in office so he can timidly implement that plan!
I'd like to hear a more in-depth discussion with Candidate Mike tonight, especially since (many of) the other candidates are in London.
He also admitted off air that he thought it would be "cool and stuff" to be mayor because he was under the impression that as mayor he would get to eat as much free ice cream as he wanted.
Have you already forgotten Pudge's death threats to Tom?
Why do you suppose so many people are voting for Philly Boy Roy, an avowed hater of all things New Jersey? Then again, in a country where so many working-class people vote Republican, why am I wondering?
Do you really want to participate in a pit while on line at the grocery store? Or at the library? Think of the catastrophic consequences of garbage men or police officers or EMTs who would rather form "a really good pit" than perform their duties. It would be chaos, I tell you!
That's the spirit, Richard! And to all my other supporters, I say, the gloves are off. Time to go negative on Hammerhead and Pudge Palfner.
Why are people still voting for Marky? Did you hear him shaking in his Chucks last night? No fortitude whatsoever.
Why are people still voting for Marky? Did you hear him shaking in his Chucks last night? No fortitude whatsoever.
Mike, are you implying that you DON'T want to spend more time with your family? Why do you hate families so?
Kiss the red states goodbye.
Mike, are you implying that you DON'T want to spend more time with your family? Why do you hate families so?
Kiss the red states goodbye.
What family? I grew up in an orphanage. I was abandoned as a child in a bowling bag left in a laundromat. After years of therapy I had recently put all of those horrible memories behind me, samir, but thanks to you they all just came rushing back.
On 10/9/07 you said that family members encouraged you to run for office and then helped obtained the required 37 signatures by spending the night outside of a Stop & Shop.
A mayor who lies about his own family and concocts a tale of childhood abandonment? No thanks.
On 10/9/07 you said that family members encouraged you to run for office and then helped obtained the required 37 signatures by spending the night outside of a Stop & Shop.
A mayor who lies about his own family and concocts a tale of childhood abandonment? No thanks.
I was using the term "family" loosely in that instance, Omar, sort of like Charlie Manson when he would refer to his "family."
I own a Zune and I'm drunk right now.
I don't know if there are plans to do this already, but I think we should narrow some of the names out of the list. There are 5-6 candidates that are clearly the Mike Gravels and Sam Brownbacks of the race. I say narrow down the ballot. Who's with me?
I don't know if there are plans to do this already, but I think we should narrow some of the names out of the list. There are 5-6 candidates that are clearly the Mike Gravels and Sam Brownbacks of the race. I say narrow down the ballot. Who's with me?
PBR can't be allowed to win. Seriously. He's from Philly. C'mon people.
I don't know if there are plans to do this already, but I think we should narrow some of the names out of the list. There are 5-6 candidates that are clearly the Mike Gravels and Sam Brownbacks of the race. I say narrow down the ballot. Who's with me?
I'd support that.
PBR can't be allowed to win. Seriously. He's from Philly. C'mon people.
Sir Ben Kingsly throws his Doc Martin into the ring for Hammerhead
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Nt5QNS-SVxs&eurl=http://www.poetv.com/video.php?vid=44293
Philly Boy Roy will prevail because of his stong appeal to the youth demographic (0-12 years old).
VOTE FOR H R PUDGE 'N STUFF!
Vote AP-Mike, He'll fix the economy.
He has been selling lightbulbs door-to-door and sending the money to AIG.
This message was approved by the Committee to Elect AP Mike and keep that rat-bastard Philly Boy Roy out of Newbridge.
Richard, can you take care of Michelle "Chicago-style" (hint, hint)? I have big things in store for you if you take care of this "piece of work." Thank you.
I couldn't vote yesterday and I can't vote today. I hope this doesn't affect PBR's chances...
It's OK, I voted for him 2wice today.
I couldn't vote yesterday and I can't vote today. I hope this doesn't affect PBR's chances...
I've been voting for Pudge exclusively as well. Going to threaten me obliquely, too, Mike?
What can you offer for my endorsement, AP Mike? Because, you know, down here in the south, I got juice.
What can you offer for my endorsement, AP Mike? Because, you know, down here in the south, I got juice.
Do you like money, Dave? My "community chest" is overflowing.
I've been voting for Pudge exclusively as well. Going to threaten me obliquely, too, Mike?
If you call pulling a few strings to steer a hurricane towards Maine threatening you "obliquely," Sarah, so be it.
I thought I'd check in with you before I voted today, Mike, to find out whether you got that tattoo of my name over your upper lip, in the Hitler-moustache position, as requested. If you need to claim it's in the Chaplin-moustache position for campaigning purposes, that's acceptable.
I'm glad you asked Julie.
Bob is a freedom-loving resident Newbridge who, like yourself, is a dog-owner. He is attentive to the needs of his dog, Rollins Band, who he bought as a puppy in the early 90's. Every one of his calls is interrupted to look after Rollins Band. Sometimes twice. Bob's aspirations to *help* the Best Show is always tempered by his love of the little guy, Rollins Band.
By contributing the The Best Show in a manner that he feels would benefit the listener, Bob has his eye on the citizen's livelihood. His ability to use cassette's to accent and boost his speeches make him the statesmen the Newbridge so badly needs. That's preparation. That's leadership. That's multi-media art! Just imagine the employment opportunities for speechwriters that he can provide Newbridge with.
Bob is the catalyst that will make Newbridge the Capitol of Hilarity that you and your pets deserve, Julie.
Join me. Join Bob.
Spoony
If Philly wins I'm gonna be so mad. I hate that guy.
As a former Jersey skunk who has finally wised up and moved to paradise, I had to go with PBR.
Dearest Spooniest Spoony,
I didn't even read all of those words you wrote. I'm sure you understand that I didn't have time ...
However, and I'm sure you will agree, better late than never. Or maybe you will be so pissed that I wasn't soon enough. Well, I don't have time to think about stupid things like that.Rollins BandBob has all of my support.
4. Rollins Band for President! President of Dogs!
I couldn't have said it better, Julie. Better late than never. I'm just happy to have you on board. I'm sure that if Bob was here, instead of rescuing animals and healing injured swans, he'd thank you.
..If Philly wins I'm gonna be so mad. I hate that guy.
Amen. All good citizens of Newbridge and related supporters must rise up against the foul stench of hoagies invading our airspace.
If Philly wins I'm gonna be so happy. I love that guy.
I love the banner, Regular Joe! Is there any way you can work Bryce's recent endorsement into it? I think that might help me lure some voters over from that nutcase Philly Boy Roy.
Mike stinks. Anyone but Mike™!
Bob will take you to his personal hell if you don't vote for him. Guarded by a three-headed Rollins Band.
A Vote for Bob is a vote for comedy.
C
A vote for anyone but A.P. Mike, at this point, is effectively a vote for Newbridge to be slathered in melty provolone.
Unless you want hideous bronze statues of a make-believe boxer adorning every public square in the city, you will do the responsible thing and cast your vote for A.P. Mike.
I defy you, sir! AP Mike's ever-unfolding catalog of perversions has been one of the most consistently delightful Best Show storylines of the year. Imagine what else will be revealed under the harsh scrutiny of the public eye!
It's time to stop throwing your votes away on the losing candidates and get serious, people. I voted for Ralph Nader like a naive self-righteous dummy in 2000, and I learned from it.
A vote for anyone but A.P. Mike, at this point, is effectively a vote for Newbridge to be slathered in melty provolone.
Unless you want hideous bronze statues of a make-believe boxer adorning every public square in the city, you will do the responsible thing and cast your vote for A.P. Mike.
So if you can't get behind Mike -- and, for God's sake, why can't you? -- get behind this: STOP ROY.
Mike is merely cultivating perversions for the election season, shamelessly pandering to Newbridge's deviant citizenry. PBRs lifetime devotion to squalor is self-evident and undeniable.
I vote Tor and only Tor every day.
http://gunpowderlove.net/tor.html
God! What's wrong with people! His call sucked! Bryce is funny. Zachary Brimstead is funny. Mawky Ramone is not funny. I should know. I have great taste.
God! What's wrong with people! His call sucked! Bryce is funny. Zachary Brimstead is funny. Mawky Ramone is not funny. I should know. I have great taste.
You're making me madder. and madder. and madder....
Fixed.God! What's wrong with people! His call sucked! Bryce is funny. Zachary Brimstead is funny. Mawky Ramone is not funny. I should know. I have great taste.
You're making me madduh... and madduh... and madduh...
Fixed.God! What's wrong with people! His call sucked! Bryce is funny. Zachary Brimstead is funny. Mawky Ramone is not funny. I should know. I have great taste.
You're making me madduh... and madduh... and madduh...
I'm still waiting for Rock 'n' Roll High School 2000.
I think Todd Palin's votes should be weighted to make up for lost time.
I think Todd Palin's votes should be weighted to make up for lost time.
This is the most absurd thing I've ever heard. I've got a better idea: why don't all the Todd Palin voters take their votes and flush them down the toilet.
A vote for Todd Palin = a vote for Ralph Nader or whatever douche the Libertarian Party is running in the Presidential election.
In other words, a wasted vote. So, knock yourselves out, my friends. Your boy Philly Boy Roy is going to be the next mayor of New Bridge. And, guess what? The citizens of New Bridge are going to be left holding the bag. Again.
Your boy Philly Boy Roy is going to be the next mayor of New Bridge. And, guess what? The citizens of New Bridge are going to be left holding the bag. Again.
I think Todd Palin's votes should be weighted to make up for lost time.
This is the most absurd thing I've ever heard. I've got a better idea: why don't all the Todd Palin voters take their votes and flush them down the toilet.
A vote for Todd Palin = a vote for Ralph Nader or whatever douche the Libertarian Party is running in the Presidential election.
In other words, a wasted vote. So, knock yourselves out, my friends. Your boy Philly Boy Roy is going to be the next mayor of New Bridge. And, guess what? The citizens of New Bridge are going to be left holding the bag. Again.
I think Todd Palin's votes should be weighted to make up for lost time.
Vote Pudge: the least of evils.
Mike has revealed himself to be even more awful than I initially suspected. All of this talk about "throwing your vote away." Pure propaganda. He really, really, really, really, really can't be allowed to win. Anyone but Mike™!
(Seriously)
I think Todd Palin's votes should be weighted to make up for lost time.
This is the most absurd thing I've ever heard. I've got a better idea: why don't all the Todd Palin voters take their votes and flush them down the toilet.
A vote for Todd Palin = a vote for Ralph Nader or whatever douche the Libertarian Party is running in the Presidential election.
In other words, a wasted vote. So, knock yourselves out, my friends. Your boy Philly Boy Roy is going to be the next mayor of New Bridge. And, guess what? The citizens of New Bridge are going to be left holding the bag. Again.
Mike has revealed himself to be even more awful than I initially suspected. All of this talk about "throwing your vote away." Pure propaganda. He really, really, really, really, really can't be allowed to win. Anyone but Mike™!
(Seriously)
Admit it, Jouster, you still haven't gotten over my criticisms of The Wire. That one still burns deep, doesn't it?
Mike, I'm only voting for you again. You seem sincere and a man with a bad temper is a man who can make decisions. Plus, I still hate fat kids.
I want to vote! Is this a conspiracy against AP Mike?
I want to vote! Is this a conspiracy against AP Mike?
There is a vast right wing conspiracy against AP Mike. Bastards.
I want to vote! Is this a conspiracy against AP Mike?
There is a vast right wing conspiracy against AP Mike. Bastards.
Eff them! I bet some of his votes aren't even being counted.
This is going to be a good week to be a Philadelphian:
(http://www.cantstopthebleeding.com/C1505939912/E529498389/Media/new_rogues3.jpg) (http://d.yimg.com/us.yimg.com/p/rids/20081014/i/r1213013293.jpg?x=256&y=345&q=85&sig=akXZCTZ1f6ZIu.lKTQX.cg--)
Philly Boy Roy/Matt Stairs '08
why is anybody in their right mind voting for pbr?
Sarim, are you the evil twin of Samir?
AP Mike fora hoagie free Newbridge.
I hear PBR is screwing with the voting machines, I read it on www.hoagie-election.com..
I hear PBR is screwing with the voting machines, I read it on www.hoagie-election.com..
I don't even need to read anything to believe that. Or maybe it's a bunch of fat kids who should be running extra laps in gym class instead of trying to sabotage AP Mike's chances.
I hear PBR is screwing with the voting machines, I read it on www.hoagie-election.com..
I don't even need to read anything to believe that. Or maybe it's a bunch of fat kids who should be running extra laps in gym class instead of trying to sabotage AP Mike's chances.
There are reports that he's been affixing little stickers saying "Free Tastykakez if youse votes for me!!" next to the PBR lever on Newbridge machines.
(This is just one of many reasons that Roy's got my vote).
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D_kxoxfIvYc&NR=1
is that betty white in the tastycake clip?
-yesWithdrawn
(First Post)
Come on! Brimstead is gonna bring so much to the office of mayor. You can't get more relevant!
if marky doesn't win, I will get progressively more enraged.
is it true "coupon: the movie" was supposed to feature mr. brimstead, esq, but he instead opted to tour with the sparrows?
if marky doesn't win, I will get progressively more enraged.
A Campaign Poem:
He's a man of the people,
and he won't kill Tom.
When he is elected,
he will defuse that bomb.
He won't let kids die,
just because of their weight,
Newbridge has a new Mayor
A.P. MIKE IN '08!
PBR supporters might want to consider the effects of the World Series on his behavior if he's elected mayor. It seems to me that either a win or a loss for Philadelphia could have unexpected consequences for his leadership style.
PBR supporters might want to consider the effects of the World Series on his behavior if he's elected mayor. It seems to me that either a win or a loss for Philadelphia could have unexpected consequences for his leadership style.
a word to the wise - philadelphians tend to act WORSE when they win.
I hope so. I am as anxious to get this election over as I am the presidential election.
GO AP MIKE!!!!
I don't want/need a fudge toilet.
PBR supporters might want to consider the effects of the World Series on his behavior if he's elected mayor. It seems to me that either a win or a loss for Philadelphia could have unexpected consequences for his leadership style.
a word to the wise - philadelphians tend to act WORSE when they win.
AP Mike: Different Stroszek for Different Folkszek.
AP Mike: Different Stroszek for Different Folkszek.
C'mon dudes. This is the Double-Vote-Overdrive. This is an opprotunity sent by the Zeus Of Newbridge Himself to get Bob back in the polls.
We don't want a great charecter like Bob to dissapear, do we! No!
Vote Bob!
C
AP Mike: Different Stroszek for Different Folkszek.
;D ;D ;D ;D
How about putting Stinky LeBeef on the ballot?
;D ;D ;D ;D
How about putting Stinky LeBeef on the ballot?
I just saw a Sleepy LaBeef album the other day... I had assumed it was something you have made up, Spike.
Not the singer Sleepy LeBeef. Stinky LeBeef is the actor who appeared in TRANSFORMERS and the last INDIANA JONES movie.
;D ;D ;D ;D
How about putting Stinky LeBeef on the ballot?
I just saw a Sleepy LaBeef album the other day... I had assumed it was something you have made up, Spike.
Not the singer Sleepy LeBeef. Stinky LeBeef is the actor who appeared in TRANSFORMERS and the last INDIANA JONES movie.
I wish I had the video editing chops to pull this off, but just let the movie play IN YOUR MIND:
Fade in. Black and white photography.
An adorable little girl in a field, clutching a daisy. The camera closes in on her. In the distance, the pleasant, pastoral sounds of a Little League baseball game: the crack of a bat, a small crowd cheering.
The girl plucks petals from the daisy, counting as she goes, endearingly mixing her numbers up.
GIRL: "Oooone ... two ... three ... four ... five ... seven ... um, six ... seven ... eight ... nine ... ten."
As she plucks the last petal, freeze frame. The camera zooms in, tighter and tighter, until her eyes fill the frame.
As the camera zooms in, we hear the sound of heavy, rapid footsteps, huffing and puffing, a crowd cheering "Go, Mikey, Go!" Finally, the sound of a large body sliding through dirt punctuated with a metallic clank.
CUT TO an explosion.
VOICEOVER: "Hi, this is Bob Einstein. As rib-tickling faux stuntman Super Dave Osborne, I've shown that some explosions can be funny. But no one will be laughing if Little Mikey Halversom is allowed to explode the bomb under third base. That's why I support Associate Producer Mike for Mayor of Newbridge. Remember: the only thing more ineradicable than his tattoos is his dedication to this town.
Don't let those other candidate's blow up your future. Vote A.P. Mike."
I wish I had the video editing chops to pull this off, but just let the movie play IN YOUR MIND:
Fade in. Black and white photography.
An adorable little girl in a field, clutching a daisy. The camera closes in on her. In the distance, the pleasant, pastoral sounds of a Little League baseball game: the crack of a bat, a small crowd cheering.
The girl plucks petals from the daisy, counting as she goes, endearingly mixing her numbers up.
GIRL: "Oooone ... two ... three ... four ... five ... seven ... um, six ... seven ... eight ... nine ... ten."
As she plucks the last petal, freeze frame. The camera zooms in, tighter and tighter, until her eyes fill the frame.
As the camera zooms in, we hear the sound of heavy, rapid footsteps, huffing and puffing, a crowd cheering "Go, Mikey, Go!" Finally, the sound of a large body sliding through dirt punctuated with a metallic clank.
CUT TO an explosion.
VOICEOVER: "Hi, this is Bob Einstein. As rib-tickling faux stuntman Super Dave Osborne, I've shown that some explosions can be funny. But no one will be laughing if Little Mikey Halversom is allowed to explode the bomb under third base. That's why I support Associate Producer Mike for Mayor of Newbridge. Remember: the only thing more ineradicable than his tattoos is his dedication to this town.
Don't let those other candidate's blow up your future. Vote A.P. Mike."
I wish I had the video editing chops to pull this off, but just let the movie play IN YOUR MIND:
Fade in. Black and white photography.
An adorable little girl in a field, clutching a daisy. The camera closes in on her. In the distance, the pleasant, pastoral sounds of a Little League baseball game: the crack of a bat, a small crowd cheering.
The girl plucks petals from the daisy, counting as she goes, endearingly mixing her numbers up.
GIRL: "Oooone ... two ... three ... four ... five ... seven ... um, six ... seven ... eight ... nine ... ten."
As she plucks the last petal, freeze frame. The camera zooms in, tighter and tighter, until her eyes fill the frame.
As the camera zooms in, we hear the sound of heavy, rapid footsteps, huffing and puffing, a crowd cheering "Go, Mikey, Go!" Finally, the sound of a large body sliding through dirt punctuated with a metallic clank.
CUT TO an explosion.
VOICEOVER: "Hi, this is Bob Einstein. As rib-tickling faux stuntman Super Dave Osborne, I've shown that some explosions can be funny. But no one will be laughing if Little Mikey Halversom is allowed to explode the bomb under third base. That's why I support Associate Producer Mike for Mayor of Newbridge. Remember: the only thing more ineradicable than his tattoos is his dedication to this town.
Don't let those other candidate's blow up your future. Vote A.P. Mike."
Some with video-editing skill PLEASE make this happen.
I wish I had the video editing chops to pull this off, but just let the movie play IN YOUR MIND:
Fade in. Black and white photography.
An adorable little girl in a field, clutching a daisy. The camera closes in on her. In the distance, the pleasant, pastoral sounds of a Little League baseball game: the crack of a bat, a small crowd cheering.
The girl plucks petals from the daisy, counting as she goes, endearingly mixing her numbers up.
GIRL: "Oooone ... two ... three ... four ... five ... seven ... um, six ... seven ... eight ... nine ... ten."
As she plucks the last petal, freeze frame. The camera zooms in, tighter and tighter, until her eyes fill the frame.
As the camera zooms in, we hear the sound of heavy, rapid footsteps, huffing and puffing, a crowd cheering "Go, Mikey, Go!" Finally, the sound of a large body sliding through dirt punctuated with a metallic clank.
CUT TO an explosion.
VOICEOVER: "Hi, this is Bob Einstein. As rib-tickling faux stuntman Super Dave Osborne, I've shown that some explosions can be funny. But no one will be laughing if Little Mikey Halversom is allowed to explode the bomb under third base. That's why I support Associate Producer Mike for Mayor of Newbridge. Remember: the only thing more ineradicable than his tattoos is his dedication to this town.
Don't let those other candidate's blow up your future. Vote A.P. Mike."
Some with video-editing skill PLEASE make this happen.
This is too great an idea for this not to happen!
I'm sure you could hire SuperDave himself for $50.00.
The Larry the Perv, H Man, and Z Man endorsements are working wonders!
We're going to win this thing!
Seriously, who is voting for Marky Ramone?
Seriously, who is voting for Marky Ramone?
I'm not.
It was up to him to collect the thirty-seven signatures.
BREAKING
I was in the wrong side of Manayunk today looking for an ATM. I finally found one and after I got my cash a man in a Phillies hat and a puffy vest threw a battery at my head and knocked me down and took my money. When he saw my Pudge Palfner campaign button (by the way... the race isn't over!) he got really mad, and yelled out "Why do you wannna vote for that New Jersey clown? I'm gonna teach youse a lesson!" Then he started carving the 1980s Phillies logo into my face with a giant novelty pencil. He only got as far as the "P" because the pencil made him start laughing uncontrollably.
(http://img03.picoodle.com/img/img03/3/10/24/f_Photo17m_45ae251.jpg)
Seriously, who is voting for Marky Ramone?
Seriously, who is voting for Marky Ramone?
I am. Sometimes you have to go with intellect over charisma, you know? And his "leave no child unsliced" campaign promise hit me hard. Plus I love theme parks.
-Ajax
Ramones drummer Marky Ramone will DJ in Anseo next week, as part of the Heineken Green Synergy festival. He takes to the decks at the Camden Street pub on Thursday, November 13th for the FREE gig.
I third this. I like pizza and I need a stereo system.Seriously, who is voting for Marky Ramone?
I am. Sometimes you have to go with intellect over charisma, you know? And his "leave no child unsliced" campaign promise hit me hard. Plus I love theme parks.
-Ajax
I'm with Ajax on this
I third this. I like pizza and I need a stereo system.Seriously, who is voting for Marky Ramone?
I am. Sometimes you have to go with intellect over charisma, you know? And his "leave no child unsliced" campaign promise hit me hard. Plus I love theme parks.
-Ajax
I'm with Ajax on this
Beautiful, JSP, just beautiful. I'm not ashamed to admit it brought tears to my eyes, tears of joy.
We're gonna win this thing!
We've got to get out the vote, PBR fans.
He's like the Philly Obama. A uniter, reaching across the aisle. A man of even temper and exquisite judgment.
Don't vote for MikeCain. Vote for hope.
You want this too much, Mike. It makes me very, very leery.
You want this too much, Mike. It makes me very, very leery.
How could you say that?
We've got to get out the vote, PBR fans.
He's like the Philly Obama. A uniter, reaching across the aisle. A man of even temper and exquisite judgment.
Don't vote for MikeCain. Vote for hope.
FANS? This isn't a joke, pal. Vote for AP Mike or go hang.
To answer the question, though: I think the only people who should have power are those who don't want it. Of all the candidates still in the race, Pudge seems the least interested in ruling; Mike seems to want it the most. You do the arithmetic.
Yeah, but you're ignoring the fact that your guy, the pusilanimous pip-squeak Pudge, the guy least interested in ruling, also wants to kill Tom. And I'm somehow tainted because I want to spare Tom's life (not to mention the lives of others when fatso sets off that bomb)?
Yeah, but you're ignoring the fact that your guy, the pusilanimous pip-squeak Pudge, the guy least interested in ruling, also wants to kill Tom. And I'm somehow tainted because I want to spare Tom's life (not to mention the lives of others when fatso sets off that bomb)?
And yet, as I pointed out before, Tom has frequently expressed unease about you and your ever-evolving eccentricities. I'm not at all convinced you are as free of murderous intent as you claim.
Yeah, but you're ignoring the fact that your guy, the pusilanimous pip-squeak Pudge, the guy least interested in ruling, also wants to kill Tom. And I'm somehow tainted because I want to spare Tom's life (not to mention the lives of others when fatso sets off that bomb)?
And yet, as I pointed out before, Tom has frequently expressed unease about you and your ever-evolving eccentricities. I'm not at all convinced you are as free of murderous intent as you claim.
At least PBR stays well clear of all mind-altering substances.
I've done the math: a vote for any candidate besides myself + Tom's death = no more Best Show on WFMU.
If that's what you want, that's what you'll get with every vote for my opponents.
These are the last minute slanderous politics of a down in the polls Palfner party, if you ask me. For shame!
At least PBR stays well clear of all mind-altering substances.
Really? That's news to me.
These are the last minute slanderous politics of a down in the polls Palfner party, if you ask me. For shame!
"Last-minute"? I raised the specter of Mike's malevolent tendencies weeks ago! And given the man implied that he had sent a hurricane my way in punishment for my staunch support of Pudge, I think my fears are justified. Indeed, not only did that claim confirm the fact of his violent tendencies, it also suggested Mike suffers from delusions of grandeur. Is that the kind of leader Newbridge needs? I think not.
Pudge will stammer
Or what?
IF YOU ARE A GOOD AMERICAN....
I want Philly Boy Toy as Newbridge mayor and Obama as President. That will be the American way.MY 50th POST !!!!!!
SPIKE HAD ENDORSED PBR*.
Do you really want to see It called Nembridge? Do you want to have a PBR/Spike administration.
What other reason do you need to vote for AP MIKE!!!!!!!
SPIKE HAD ENDORSED PBR.
Do you really want to see It called Nembridge? Do you want to have a PBR/Spike administration.
What other reason do you need to vote for AP MIKE!!!!!!!
SPIKE HAD ENDORSED PBR.
Do you really want to see It called Nembridge? Do you want to have a PBR/Spike administration.
What other reason do you need to vote for AP MIKE!!!!!!!
Actually, Spike endorsed somebody named "Philly Boy Toy". I don't know what he's talking about.
But "Nembridge" sounds pretty good to me. VOTE PBR!!!!
When do the Mayubernatorial polls officially close? Will Newbridge be ruled with an iron hoagie???
The suspense is killing me...
And beer and steel (iron?).
Delusions of grandeur are a positive vision for the future
I'd like to thank everyone who voted for me and contributed to my campaign. It was a valiant effort. Unfortunately, this election has only confirmed my utter lack of faith in the citizens of Newbridge and in human beings in general. I could stand here (or, more accurately, sit here still somewhat intoxicated) and tell you that it is now time to put aside our differences and unite as one, but that would be complete bullshit. I predict that the election of this buffoon as our mayor will go down as the most colossal error of judgment in the history of humanity. A hundred years from now, people will marvel at the stupidity and the total absence of sense displayed by the voters in this election.
But, as the saying goes, the people have spoken and they are idiots.
Take to the hills with gold, guns, and ammo, A.P. Mike. The true believers shall join you there. You'll teach us how to hunt, gather, and "live off the grid." And when the moment comes for us to strike, our coup will be swift and bloody.
Mike, at least you didn't lose to Marky Ramone! You must feel good about that.
Mike, at least you didn't lose to Marky Ramone! You must feel good about that.
Yeah, I didn't lose to one of a handful of surviving members of a band that is mostly deceased. I couldn't feel better!
It's funny you mention that, CB, because I've been reading Havana Nocturne by T. J. English about the mob and the Cuban revolution and it's given me a few ideas, to say the least (organized strikes, sabotage, kidnappings, violence, selective assassinations, attacks against anything Philly-related, generalized mayhem, etc.). I will drop you a line when the secret meetings begin.
Why would I meet you on your terms, AIP? The key to my coup's success will be surprise and devestating destruction.
Mike... What can I say? I tried.fixed.
When I found out you lost, I went crazy and looted the mints and toothpics that were sitting next to the cash register of the restaurant I was at. I also brutally murdered a teenager who was making election day hoagies.
Congratulations to the new mayor elect. Mike in20122018!