Author Topic: Toyota/Mylanta/Gondola imbecile  (Read 22063 times)

Mo Primo

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Toyota/Mylanta/Gondola imbecile
« on: November 16, 2008, 02:13:14 AM »
Yeah, what a paranoid, condescending douchebag that moron from Illinois was. It's weird, though, how the multiracial staff of the Afrocentric satire site The Peoples News have kind of the same opinion as this wackjob. Check out the list of recent posts centered around the headline "Federal Judge: Enough With the Stupid Names," "Black Mother First Person Arrested for Naming Her Child," and "Condi Calls for Removal of Detroit ‘Naming Rights’ Judge."

http://thepeoplesnews.wordpress.com/2008/03/02/federal-judge-enough-with-the-stupid-names/

It's like there's some kind of interracial conspiracy going on! These fools must be stopped! I mean, who the hell is anybody to challenge a parent's right to name their kids Mursaydeez, or Shahnell, or Tysunn? If they can't pronounce Mercedes like someone who actually speaks Spanish, what does it matter? It's all part of the multicultural tapestry of America, right? It's not like it's going to contribute to the further stratification and atomization of modern society or whatever. Hell, if anything, the Freds and Pattys of the world should be doing their darndest to keep step with these cultural innovators. For every child named Lablaqkweena or Ty'Rayne, there must be a Cottonelle Sloompty Spandex-Mitterand or a Nutella Framblips Kleenex-Yamamoto. It's easy... almost... formulaic, even. That kind of brave emphasis on ultra-competitive uniqueness is one of those things that I don't think we'll live to see spreading through the world, though.

Oh... wait...

http://www.iht.com/articles/2007/01/07/news/venez.php

Yeah... shame on that twit for trying to steer a perfectly good discussion about mundane popular phenomena to something "important." There's a place for that kind of self-righteous trash, and it's not on The Best Show.

todd

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Re: Toyota/Mylanta/Gondola imbecile
« Reply #1 on: November 16, 2008, 05:10:13 AM »
what're you, Glenn Beck?

Mo Primo

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Re: Toyota/Mylanta/Gondola imbecile
« Reply #2 on: November 16, 2008, 06:11:57 AM »
I'm calling for the bar to be raised on names that are like caricatures of real names. If that's where we're going, if that's the way of the future, we might as well get started early. We can make the Jessica of today look like the Esther or Gertrude of yesterday in no time flat.... I'm thinking by 2015, perhaps? ;D

Trembling Eagle

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Re: Toyota/Mylanta/Gondola imbecile
« Reply #3 on: November 16, 2008, 12:31:01 PM »
I'll pay for the plane ticket to come fight you wherever you are. Bare hands or blunt/edged weapons if you prefer.

Denim Gremlin

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Re: Toyota/Mylanta/Gondola imbecile
« Reply #4 on: November 16, 2008, 01:01:44 PM »
i'm pretty sure you just jumped to that racial conclusion. that call was stupid but it struck me as just a poor attempt at observational humor.
I was the first guy in hardcore to whip people with his belt.

Mo Primo

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Re: Toyota/Mylanta/Gondola imbecile
« Reply #5 on: November 16, 2008, 02:32:44 PM »
What's interesting is that The Onion, a rag to which our own dear Tom has been a contributor, no less, was on top of this nonsense ten #&@%ing years ago:

Most Popular U.S. Baby names

http://www.theonion.com/content/node/37014

My humble opinion is that they never pushed the joke to its logical end because they also have to live with the rest of you when you get offended... in other words... they got all squeamish about it. I pledge not to make that same mistake.

yesno

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Re: Toyota/Mylanta/Gondola imbecile
« Reply #6 on: November 16, 2008, 02:56:11 PM »
See, the Onion can make racially-tinged jokes because it's funny.

The moron from Illinois was not.

Mo Primo

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Re: Toyota/Mylanta/Gondola imbecile
« Reply #7 on: November 16, 2008, 03:53:24 PM »
If you actually read the stories at The Peoples News, I think your appetite for funny will be adequately sated. Or will it? See, if you check out the forums, you'll find that there are plenty of people who are pretty much apoplectic with rage over the same thing our favorite idiot from Illinois merely paraphrased. Now, I don't know if what TPN is doing is necessarily funny, as in frivolous-harmless-entertainment funny, but I do think that it certainly is, um.... what's the word? Oh, yeah.... EFFECTIVE.

Shaggy 2 Grote

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Re: Toyota/Mylanta/Gondola imbecile
« Reply #8 on: November 16, 2008, 05:20:39 PM »
I read this thread and then went to that blog and all I can say is, if you don't give me my minute and a half back immediately, I'm sending Trembling Eagle over to beat your nonsensical ass.
Oh, good heavens. I didn’t realize. I send my condolences out to the rest of the O’Connor family.

cutout

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Re: Toyota/Mylanta/Gondola imbecile
« Reply #9 on: November 16, 2008, 08:26:05 PM »
The Causes and Consequences of Distinctively Black Names

Quote
Among Blacks born in the last two decades, names provide a strong signal of socioeconomic status, which was not previously the case. We find, however, no negative relationship between having a distinctively Black name and later life outcomes after controlling for a child's circumstances at birth.

theyellowchair

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Re: Toyota/Mylanta/Gondola imbecile
« Reply #10 on: November 16, 2008, 09:22:06 PM »
I've reached yet another peak in the roller coaster ride that is my overall opinion of Trembling Eagle.

Mo Primo

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Re: Toyota/Mylanta/Gondola imbecile
« Reply #11 on: November 16, 2008, 09:58:48 PM »
My God. You're... you're all.... absolutely right. How dare black people satirize each other? How dare white folks laugh right alongside them? I'm going to burn all my Chris Rock CDs, like, yesterday.

*Uncontrollable sobbing*

*Sniff... sniff...*

Now.... what I find totally fascinating is that not one person (excepting Cutout) has thought about this for longer than two minutes, and have simply let predictable left-liberal reflexive rage dictate their response. Even in the case of Cutout's not-entirely-helpful link to a subscriber-only academic paper, you have a calm, reasoned appeal to PC conventional wisdom.

[Heads up to Cutout: I read Leavitt's Freakonomics, and I have been keeping tabs on the Freakonomics blog at the NYT, and I've noticed that the debate about names is not entirely dead over there, either. To wit:

http://freakonomics.blogs.nytimes.com/2008/04/25/are-distinctively-african-american-names-a-thing-of-the-past/

.... and related topic:

http://freakonomics.blogs.nytimes.com/2008/07/07/how-much-does-it-cost-you-in-wages-if-you-sound-black/

I would also check out John McWhorter's scholarship. He gets into related matters in his books "Losing The Race" and "Winning The Race," which are not about the naming issue per se as they are attempting to diagnose and perhaps cure larger social ills. I don't always agree with him, but he's smarter than me, and it's food for thought.]

So! There's more than one kind of socio-political orthodoxy at work here, and it's pretty clear where most of the FOT populace tends to sit, if they sit anywhere at all.

I am saying this as someone who has embodied every left-liberal-radical cliché ever and recovered. I've browbeaten myself for being the Eurocentric phallocentric oppressor, tried veganism, marched in militant gay pride rallies, fellated and buggered men, eaten out of dumpsters (but only upscale dumpsters), chopped veg and swept floors at a goddamn "anarchist" Temporary Autonomous Zone, slept among homeless in the park, first (girl) love was from Sri Lanka, subscribed to every commie pinko rag in existence, speak one Euro language with fluency and am literate in a few others, went to an insane asylum for a while, volunteered with and donated to lots of bleeding-heart causes, card-carrying Amnesty Int'l./ACLU/former AFL-CIO, went to friggin' Ani DiFranco shows with a bunch of lesbians, and, uh, dropped a ridiculous amount of cash to ensure the global supremacy and longevity of hippie-noise station WFMU, because like any good full-of-shit liberal-leftist, I have inherited some money. Oh, and I voted for Obama in the primaries and the general election, and helped vote him into office as a senator. (I could go on, by the way. I am the cliché incarnate.)

So, I'm just saying, I've paid my dues as a liberal batshit lunatic.

AND YET.

I haven't drunk all of that particular batch of magic Kool-Aid.

I retain the right to a moderately conservative opinion regarding the phenomenon of people disrespecting their children with ridiculous names. It is a trend that does not bode well for us, I fear. I am not alone in that regard.

On the other hand, I fancy myself a pragmatist, so I am fully prepared to take that road, but only on the condition that we become much more creative and wacky and even, ugh, ironic, about the whole business.  :P

yesno

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Re: Toyota/Mylanta/Gondola imbecile
« Reply #12 on: November 16, 2008, 10:32:41 PM »
I've worked for 6 Republican presidential administrations and have won the Nobel Memorial Prize in Economic Sciences for my work advocating the elimination of government handouts to welfare queens.  I am a proud Son of the Old South.  I have inherited a small fortune derived from selling arms to South Africa under apartheid.  I have small stable of smooth asian boys with whom I take my pleasure, yet I donated over $100,000 to support Prop 8:  because it's not "gay" if you're on top.  I've sentenced boys younger than you to the gas chamber.  (Didn't want to do it. I felt I owed it to them.)  I type these very words from a National Review-sponsored cruise.

I have drunk all of that particular batch of magic Kool-Aid.

AND YET.

I retain the right to point out that you're a dink.

Martin

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Re: Toyota/Mylanta/Gondola imbecile
« Reply #13 on: November 16, 2008, 10:41:45 PM »
I retain the right to point out that you're a dink.

Dink... hunt?

Mo Primo

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Re: Toyota/Mylanta/Gondola imbecile
« Reply #14 on: November 16, 2008, 11:22:13 PM »
Aaaaaaaaaaand there's the end of the fight, Mo Primo has been knocked out of the ring by a truly crushing ad hominem from Will "Yum-Yum" F. Bukkleigh... some dude who looks like a lady has stepped in to ref the fight.... what's that? Mo Primo is crawling back into the ring? Does this fool have a death wish? Doesn't he realize that he is considered persona non grata here?

Oh... right... the discussion didn't go anywhere except BACK TO JUNIOR HIGH.

Try again. Try harder. Put some thought into it.... and provide something in the way of insight. I actually want to hear from Cutout again. He's probably the only serious one here. I could concede defeat if he could prove conclusively that naming your child YuNeeq or Sha'Wayne or Apple or Gimbulops is not a complete travesty, another step towards Idiocracy. Seriously, do we want Upgrayedd? Do we? Tom said something on the last show about how we need to grow up, having a grown-up president now, and all... how about it?