I think I might at least be able to talk to Kevin Smith. He honestly does seem like a decent sort - just someone who provides the polar opposite of what I seek in my entertainment enjoyment.
If Dane Cook was on the island, I'd be off the island. I dont know how, but I'd find a way. I'd take my chances floating on a string of coconut shells. I couldn't take talking to that guy for more than five minutes before I'd sacrifice myself to the gods by tossing my own body into the volcano.
Tom.